Monday, March 4, 2013

The Land of Cats

Short story: you can't quite do it with dogs.

In the land of cats where the cats are people, the people, who are cats, congregate by breed.  The cats categorize first by short hair and then by long. And then the breeds break further into groups.  The calicos lead the tabbies who lead the Persians who lead the--well so on and so forth.

And all the breeds speak suspiciously of the others, insisting that each breed is the height of deception.  So a tabby will often be found to whisper on the street to another tabby friend that the black cat is suspicious.  And as the black cat crosses the two tabbies' path, they tip their hats and smile like the Cheshire.

And when the black cat is out of sight, the long tabby with the monocle says to the short one with the bowler, "those black cats can't be trusted, for they groom too close and lick their hindquarters."

A sad and prejudiced thing those statements are. The black cat too had much to say when he was sure the other two were away.  "those tabbies scared me with their sinister Cheshire grins and ticking stare that follows you slowly from here to there.  It's a product of their nature, they can't help it.  They groom too close and often lick their hindquarters."