Monday, August 29, 2011

Space Wanted

Ever notice how awful having a space with no one to live in it is? Do you hate having no one to make your empty studio or 1 bedroom feel like a home?

Well now there's a solution! From the makers of the Room Mate comes the Re-GrUEP—Recently Graduated Under-Employed Person. What is that? It's more than just a passing fad, it's the way of the future! With rising unemployment and a down economy the Re-GrUEP can be yours for sublet or short-term lease for the low monthly rate of...wait for it.

Wait for it...

-$600 to -$950! That's right, we pay you to give the Re-GrUEP a wonderful place to call home. Now all your telemarketer friends will have a new number to call. Now that dusty can be filled and you don't have to worry about that space lying empty and alone!

But wait there's more, the Re-GrUEP comes with his very own Long-Time Awesome Girlfriend—the LoTAG! The LoTAG has a job and does the math of splitting the rent so you don't have to. All you have to do is provide the Re-GrUEP and the LoTAG with a space to call home. This set of young na├»ve kids trying to just make it in this crazy mixed up world comes with suitcases and the autonomous ability to breathe and eat on their own. No maintenance required!

The set is totally capable of making their own payments for the foreseeable future, and the adorable pair will even go to their jobs and produce for the flagging economy. It's enjoyable to watch these young upstarts try to:
--Do dishes
--Separate whites from darks in the laundry
--Go on super-cheap dates
--Figure out cell-phone contracts
--And much more!

It's really up to them, and everyday is a new experience. The Re-GrUEP can cook, has a passion for urban planning and conflict-resolution, and can fold hundreds of tiny origami paper cranes—it's a riot! The LoTAG just got a BFA in theater, is incessantly enthusiastic, speaks with her hands and her mouth, and can do some mean sword stage combat—deadly and wild!

Call in the next fifteen minutes and we'll toss in the Hygiene Accessory Kit—HAcK. You'll laugh as the Re-GrUEP and LoTAG try to use these products to clean the space and themselves. What happens when they mix lye and water? I don't know but I can't wait to find out!

Call Nick at 775 830 7876. Sorry, only available in the state of Washington; specifically owners of space in the Seattle area.