Thursday, July 7, 2011

Word Up-chuck


Today is Bungie day.  Not actually sure what it is but I have to go play Halo.  David's (my cousin) request.

So I'm going to make this basically a spate of things.  First, Archer the tv show is really funny.  Quirky and obscene but funny.  Also Star Trek: TNG and Voyager and Enterprise are all now on Netflix instant watch.  Geeks everywhere rejoice.

Ray Bradbury's The Martian Chronicles is an awesome book.  Painfully outdated and scientifically wrong in many ways but an excellent allegory.  Read it sometime.

I really liked the scene in Bridesmaids—actually I loved the whole damn movie—where Kristin Wiig's character is talking to her hook-up in bed.  He's a real jerk and she invites him to a wedding.  He declines and she says it's ok, she was going to go with a guy, “named...er...George.”  The jerk is disbelieving and they have a little conversation, and then he looks at her and goes, “well, can George do this?”  And he starts rubbing her boob in a kind of grotesque manner.  Wiig replies after a time, “probably.”

I thought that was really funny.  But the point is that I want to do a whole sketch based on pillow talk and couple-y things.  But I don't know if I can pull it off without making it seem mushy and therefore just disgusting to watch.  I don't want to write repugnant things.

Except when I do.

I have applied to too many jobs.  Mama asked me earlier, “what can you do?”

I replied, “be unemployed.  It's the only thing I can really seem to do.”

I love to listen to public radio.  It is the most amazing broadcasting and has excellent journalism.  Depth and intrigue.  Watching 24 hour news is like masturbating; it's shallow and only worth shame and a mess you have to clean up.  Public broadcasting is like having the best sex of your life, pillow talk, and then breakfast in bed.  And then going outside and finding a Ferrari in your driveway.

Food is super important to people.  I want to make a restaurant that is healthy, philosophically sound, and really takes into account the social aspect of a meal's importance.

Attach it to a gym.  It would have menu categories based on how the customer wants to shape their workouts: a muscle-man category with lots of lean protein, a skinny bitch category with filling and wholesome selections that are light on actual calories, etc. 

I often use etc when I mean to put in more ideas but actually have none.

I was going to write a fantastical sci-fi story tonight.  Sorry.  I have to go get lost in my worlds.