Thursday, July 21, 2011

Cherry Clouds


Sometimes we can't escape our dreams. Last night I had the most vivid dream that I was sailing a boat. The water was rough and we were heading back in to be safe. I was steering fine, everything was simple. Then a freak wave, about 100 feet high capsized the boat and tossed everyone into the cold water. We swam the boat to shore and pulled it up.

I talked to my dad about the dream today and he told me that it was symbolic of my goals and impending failure due to something unforeseen. I brushed the disconcerting thought off. It was unsettling to hear the possibility of my works disappearing before my eyes. I looked out on the stormy waves. The beautiful night before had turned into a windy day with choppy whitecaps. What was supposed to be a sunny day was in reality gray and cloudy. The sky undulated indistinctly between gray and darker gray. But it was still fairly early in the day, it would open up and be sunny, hopefully the wind would die down.

Earlier, we had surveyed the house and looked over the things that needed to get done. Getting a machete was one of those things. I just want a hedge-trimmer that is also a deadly weapon. I want to attach a chain to it and start swinging it to cut down the bushes around here. I want to be the 'Bush Assassin' and I mean that only in the context of blackberry bushes all you dirty minded/political readers.

The other thing I noticed in my Tour de Vaughn was that we were experiencing a peculiar growing season. Instead of blackberries out in full force, there are only the green bitter buds of the fruit, and still a fair few flowers. It is still spring here. But the cherries said that was a load of crock and are beautifully ripe. Natalie and Olivia picked hundreds of cherries and we ate them on the beach. The clouds parted for a minute and we stood on an island of sun eating dark red cherries.

The day passed rather uneventfully forward. The wind stayed constant. I decided I would like to go paddling in the kayak. Rene (my sister Olivia's boyfriend) wanted to come too. So we went out. I should have known it was a bad idea from the start. Right on the first wave a huge deluge of water washed into the boat. Every wave subsequent was just about the same. As I paddled further and further out I realized that two people in the kayak was perhaps too many people in this weather. I told Rene to lean with the wave so that we could try to keep some water out.

That was bad advice. The boat capsized. Falling into the water is such a moment. It happens quickly, slowly, never, and eternally. It is experiencing the moment between two binary states; something that shouldn't be, yet is. And once it is done, the mind has to take a moment to shift states as well.

I wasn't planning on swimming, especially in the cold windy weather, but there I was, swimming with my sister's boyfriend, trying to get back to shore. I collected my thoughts and headed in, soaking wet. Sometimes you can't escape your dreams.